Pulphouse #19, August/September 2022

Pulphouse #19, August/September 2022

“Bump in the Night” by Kevin J. Anderson

“Holding Out for a Hero” by Christina F. York

“A Father’s Daughter” by Lisa S. Silverthorne (nongenre, not reviewed)

“Bones” by Rob Vagle (reprint, not reviewed)

“You Know We’ve Got a Hell of a band” by David H. Hendrickson (reprint, not reviewed)

“No. 40 Basin Street” by O’Neil De Noux (reprint, not reviewed)

“Duck” by Ray Vukcevich (reprint, not reviewed)

“Creative Constructions, Inc.” by Kent Patterson (reprint, not reviewed)

“The Last Lonely Day in the Orchard of Lost Travelers” by Scott Edelman

“One Wild Night” by Adam-Troy Castro

“The Tombstone Barber” by Robert J. McCarter

“Wicked Local Food Fight” by Johanna Rothman

“Elf Help Seminar” by Stefon Mears (reprint, not reviewed)

“Gone with the Flamingos” by C.A. Rowland (nongenre, not reviewed)

“If I’m Lyin’, I’m Dyin'” by Jason A. Adams

“Terrier at 20,000 Feet” by Jerry Oltion

“Self Service” by J. Steven York (nongenre, not reviewed)

“Five Starving Cats and a Dead Dog” by Kristine Kathryn Rusch (reprint, not reviewed)

“A Quiet Neighborhood” by Annie Reed (reprint, not reviewed)

“The 1970s Must Die!” by Robert Jeschonek (reprint, not reviewed)

Reviewed by Victoria Silverwolf

In addition to new tales of science fiction and fantasy, with a strong emphasis on comedy, the original fiction in this issue includes a pair of grim crime stories and a heartwarming account of an elderly woman’s eccentric collection.

“Bump in the Night” by Kevin J. Anderson is one of a series of stories about a zombie private detective in a world full of supernatural beings. In this adventure, a literal boogeyman hires him to keep his three aunts from running his life. He wants to give up his role of creating fear and work as an insurance agent. The aunts, who also induce terror into their victims, want him to continue the family’s traditional function. The detective has to dig up the aunts’ dark secrets in order to release the boogeyman from their influence.

This is a clever, tongue-in-cheek story, with a dry sense of humor. The contrast between the meek, gentle boogeyman and his unwelcome duty is amusing. The way in which the detective defeats the monstrous aunts also provides plenty of smiles, without descending into farce.

Although no names are mentioned, “Holding Out for a Hero” by Christina F. York is obviously narrated by Guinevere, who is looking back on her marriage to King Arthur and her affair with Sir Lancelot. She concludes that it’s better to live in a nunnery than with men.

The main source of comedy in this very brief story is the contrast between the familiar legend and the modern style in which it is related. Otherwise, there is not much to it.

The viewpoint character in “The Last Lonely Day in the Orchard of Lost Travelers” by Scott Edelman is a pig. The farmer with whom it lived has disappeared. It wanders the deserted farm, surviving on apples falling from the trees, wondering when one of the many people who pass by when they have lost their way will show up.

This is an odd story indeed. Its speculative content is extremely vague and subtle. There are hints that there is something strange about time at the farm. The fact that the farmer removed one of the pig’s legs, revealed early in the text, is bewildering, given the fact that he otherwise treated the animal as a pet. I have to admit that the author’s intent escapes me.

In “One Wild Night” by Adam-Troy Castro, a woman goes off with a man for a one-night stand in a fabulous Hollywood mansion. It soon becomes clear that her unexplained lust is a result of new technology, intended for use in the motion picture industry, that creates vivid illusions while blocking one’s ability to understand that they are not real. Being abused in this way is the least of her problems, however, when the technology gets way out of hand, leading to a fight for survival and an extraordinary transformation.

The title is appropriate, given the story’s breathless pace and constantly building sense of suspense. In addition to providing a thrilling plot, the author also paints a convincingly cynical portrait of the ruthless use of power by the wealthy,

In “The Tombstone Barber” by Robert J. McCarter, an antique straight razor takes control of the man who buys it, drawing him back to the site of a famous gunfight in the Old West. There are few surprises in this tale of a haunted object, which plays out pretty much as one would expect.

“Wicked Local Food Fight” by Johanna Rothman involves a bumbling magician who causes edible items to battle amongst themselves, leading to total chaos in a modern Massachusetts community. A classic spunky girl reporter comes to his aid, making use of her knowledge of the area to reverse the spell.

As can be told, this is a very silly story, notable mostly for its local color. Readers who find the notion of a knife-wielding sausage amusing will enjoy it.

The narrator of “If I’m Lyin’, I’m Dyin”” by Jason A. Adams is a heavy-drinking blue-collar worker who takes a ride with a truck-driving Santa Claus on Christmas Eve. In order to get his name off the Naughty list, the man has to labor for Santa as he makes his deliveries.

This is an outrageous tall tale, in which the Moon is literally made of green cheese. How much pleasure one derives from it may depend on how much one is willing to tolerate holiday whimsey.

The punning title of “Terrier at 20,000 Feet” by Jerry Oltion is a strong hint that it retells the famous Twilight Zone episode, starring William Shatner, in which a gremlin tears up an airplane in flight. In this version, a mysterious little dog, with the ability to pass through walls, appears out of nowhere. A stewardess has to deal with the animal, as well as with the nervous passenger who claims to see a monster on the wing of the plane.

The allusion to a fondly remembered bit of television fantasy seems to be the major point of the story. The presence of the dog is never fully explained, although it plays a major role in the plot.


Victoria Silverwolf has seen every episode of the original Twilight Zone.